I found this web site that has bereavement poems, and there was a section there for those that have lost babies and children. I have found a few poems that I thought really sumed up how I feel. Sometimes it is so hard to explain to people how you are feeling, and if you have read this blog, it can be the smallest thing that sends you into this abyss of sadness, and sorrow. Here is one of the poems I found there.
I'm An Angel Now
One night I cried to Jesus as I sat beneath a tree, I looked into the open sky and hoped he'd answer me...... I'm lost dear Lord, I've travelled far, but still I seem to roam. Please light the way and lead me Lord, I need to get back home....
I told him of my burdens, and the sadness in my heart. That from his gracious love, I'd never felt so far apart... Why did you take my child Lord? I cannot understand! No longer can I touch his face, or hold his tiny hand...
I am angry Lord, I'm missing him, I'm drowning in my sorrow Please help to heal my yesterday and face each new tomorrow.... It was then I heard his gently voice and felt his presence near How I wanted to hold him as I cried another tear...
He said Mummy, I am an angel now my spirit will be free I'm an angel now in heaven, so please don't cry for me I was choosen by our Lord above and now I am in his care When you need me, look inside your heart, I promise to be there
No one can ever take away our bond with one another For I will always be your precious child, as you will be my mother So if you cannot find your way, or the road to home seems far Just look up to the heavens.....and I will be your guiding star
He said 'Mummy, I am an angel now, my spirit will be free I'm an angel now in heaven, no need to cry for me....'
Written by Janice Grogen
I don't think it is possible to ever be able to stop crying for your child that is gone. I know I will never stop crying for Harrison. I know there will always be a piece of my heart that is missing. It will never go away this ache, this pain will be with me forever. It has left a scar on my life. I miss him so much, I never thought you could miss someone so much, someone who I only saw for 28 hours. But I knew for 9 months. 9 months of an unbreakable love that will never ever go away.
I love you Harrison.