Friday, November 19, 2010

We love you....

I stared at you all day the day that you were dying. trying to take every little thing in. It was hard to stop crying to try and take in all those things. There are moments like last night that I just want to scream why!!!! While I am pregnant I don't drink, I don't smoke at all, I don't even like to take a panadol while I am pregnant. Why did it happen to me?? You hear of mothers that smoke, some do drugs, some people drink and there babies are born healthy, and not that I am wishing it upon any one what happened to Harrison, but sometimes the world doesn't make any sense. My hubby works, we can support 4 children, we love our children dearly and would do anything for them. I just don't understand.
Alot of people ask me if we are going to have another one. I don't know. I didn't want a big age gap, as all the other boys have large age gaps, so when Harrison came along I thought that was great as I wouldn't have the age gap like the other boys. (the age gap has been by choice) Now if I was to have a baby, our son will nearly be 3, we will still have a reasonable age gap. I don't know. A part of me thinks it would be to hard. I am not sure on that question.
God tell my little boy that he is so missed, and loved so much.

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